Whether you love or hate it, it is coming around to that time of year again, CHRISTMAS! Whilst this year is going to be very different due to Coronavirus and the national and local lockdowns it can still be fun and enjoyable. If you are not a fan of Christmas and find it very stressful, whilst you cannot cancel it you can prepare for it with A Snowflake’s Guide to Christmas by Dave Skinner.
“Christmas is a time for snowflake’s”
A snowflake, according to Wikipedia, is a derogatory slang term for a person, implying that they have an inflated sense of uniqueness, an unwarranted sense of entitlement, or are overly-emotional, easily offended, and unable to deal with opposing opinions. A very sensitive person who is easily hurt or offended by the statements or actions of others.
A Snowflake’s Guide to Christmas is a light-hearted survival guide for the liberal minded modern millennial to navigate the perils of the ethical and political Christmas festivities.
Whether you are a wide-a-woke snowflake or a noflake, this survival guide will steer you through the Christmas season, including New Year, with lots of humour. It covers:
The Problem With …
- Christmas Trees
- Christmas Crackers
- Carol Singers
- Christmas Shopping
- Christmas Gifts for Children
- Christmas Gifts for Grown Ups
- Christmas Decorations
- Christmas Cards
- Christmas Food & Drink
- Family Gatherings
- Christmas Party Games
- Office Christmas Parties
- Christmas Music
- Christmas TV
- New Year’s Eve
- New Year’s Resolutions
It also features A Snowflake’s Christmas Letter to Santa and pictures of Emotional Support Animals to Quell Christmas-induced Rage.
After reading this book you will have learned how to:
- Launch a scathing dinner table takedown on your woefully unwoke relatives
- Craft your own sustainable decorations that bring festive cheer without compromising the 2050 Paris Agreement
- Splurge on Black Friday without propping up the neoliberal capitalist agenda
- Build a body-positive snowperson that isn’t a straight white male for once
- Skilfully avoid eating meat or dairy without it becoming a whole thing you have to justify for an hour
Overall, this is a very light-hearted, non-offensive book on how to survive Christmas in an ethical and woke way. It starts with the oppression of conifers used as Christmas Trees – trees grown only to be chopped down, taken home, stuck in the corner of a room, decorated and lit up so you, your family and all your friends can slowly watch it die!
The book offers humours solutions to all The Problems With … issues like the Christmas Tree – you can rent a living one and return it after Christmas where it loving nurtured to carry on growing (it is a real service, I looked it up), or you can use a Christmas Pot Plant or even paint a picture of a tree or decorate another adult to stand in the corner.
Interspersed throughout the book are “Call Out Corners” which explain why all your favourite Christmas traditions are basically evil.
There is alternative lyrics for the 12 Days of Christmas, appropriate for all faiths (and none!).
This is a great little book that is very tongue-in-cheek with its humour. It looks at issues of climate change, social politics, recycling and more for the “woke” individuals in a way that is funny but not overly offensive or mean-spirited – so no snowflakes should be harmed whilst reading it as long as the reader has a sense of humour (although I can’t guarantee that).
A witty and funny Christmas survival guide that is a humorous read and one that would make a good stocking filler or Secret Santa gift. It isn’t a book that you need to read from cover to cover, you can dip in and out to any “problem” that you want to.
If you want to add a bit of cheer to the run up to Christmas this year, then I can recommend A Snowflake’s Guide to Christmas by Dave Skinner. It approaches some very real-world issues in a fun, light-hearted way that even the biggest switched on, enlightened, woken sensitive and caring individual should find funny.
Christmas starts here with the snowflake’s survival guide.
RRP: £9.99 (Hardback) / £7.99 (Kindle)
Available to buy from Amazon here.